12:18 Journal Entry - Everything


12:18 and I can sit here and watch you sleep all night. I wonder what you dream as I’m wondering what this all means. The hardest thing is coming home to you already asleep. No play time for me. I’m missing all the important laughs and screams. Only a few hours before I have to leave. And you question where I may be. I’m sorry baby daddy has to make money. In order to care for you, in order to care for mom, in order to grow so hold on b/c I promise this struggle won’t be for long. I never want you to see the reasons I weep. I never want you to go through this pain and have to fight to be free. I swear the visions of you is the only thing that makes me believe. You can be anything you want to be. But this world won’t let that come easily. I hope you can forgive me. For always working while your home wishing of me, for always being tired when you’re ready to go play. Little Ivy I’ll find a way and so will you. Your presence keeps me growing stronger just witnessing your beautiful youth. So continue to be you and I love you. I can’t wait for the days everything i dream comes true. I can’t wait for being able to provide what you wish for to you. I’ll never fall because of you. So I’ll work 24/8 if I have to. As long as you know what you mean to me. ..Everything. 

#August #JournalEntry

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